Online Interactions and "netiquette"

The online world

Kids interact online with friends, family and sometimes strangers. While most of these interactions are positive, sometimes the internet can lead to negative interactions with others: sexual exploitation and cyberbullying.

Children and online exploitation

While children are online they could come into contact with people who want to exploit them. Certain people go online in an attempt to manipulate or abuse young people. The exploiters can even be teenagers or young adults; they are not always the stereotypical older man.

Most of online activities are not harmful when you take the right precautions, but the following could bring your children into contact with people who want to exploit them:

• Online chatting
• Photo sharing
• Webcams
• Sexting
• Online gaming
• Social networking websites

The signs

Your child may begin to show signs that they are having problems online, like withdrawal, spending extended periods of time on the computer, or suddenly staying away from the computer.

People who want to exploit your kids online may try to win them over by giving them lots of attention, compliments or gifts. They are sometimes patient and willing to work at gaining your kids trust for weeks or even months. Others may use threats or claim that they are in an emergency to convince your children to cooperate. Some are teenagers, and others may pose as teenagers online and develop a "friendship" with your child with the goal of meeting them for sexual purposes. Some will slowly and gradually introduce sexual content into conversations, while others work faster, introducing sexual content very quickly.

How to stay safe

When your children are online, remind them:

• Never to give out or post any personal information, like their address, phone number, password or photograph. It is surprisingly easy for strangers, or other young people your children have met online, to track down your children even with the smallest amount of information.
• To use impersonal nicknames that do not give away any identifying information in chat programs and other sites.
• To think about their online reputation -- what they say and do online can reveal a lot about them and can have an impact on how others view them. Acting before they think might give others the wrong impression or attract unwanted attention.
• If your child is talking to people he/she doesn't know offline (for example, someone she only knows through an online game), use a voice-mask so others don't know her age or gender.
• Not to believe everything they're told. They have no way of knowing who is telling the truth on the Internet.
• If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
• To ask you for permission before they make an arrangement to meet in person someone they have met online. Make sure they meet in a public place and are not alone.
• If they share photos or videos of themselves, the images can never be taken back. Once it's out there, it's there for the whole world -- including you, the parents, and future employers -- to see.
• Unplug their webcam when they aren't using it, and avoid webcam chats -- participants can record live video and you can't control where the images may end up.
• Not to let other people - including friends - convince them to do something they aren't comfortable with.
• Report abuse to the service provider in cases where someone is misusing a service to inappropriately communicate with a minor
• Report online child sexual exploitation to a reporting tip line (in Canada, these reports should go to local police or Cybertip.ca).

Using "netiquette"

When interacting with others online, help make sure your kids' interactions are positive by encouraging them to abide by the common rules of "netiquette" (online etiquette):

• Don't say anything online that you would not repeat or say in person. Why should this be an issue? Because the anonymity of the Internet may lead people to say things on the Internet that are inappropriate, rude or embarrassing. This can have offline consequences, like losing friends.
• Never deceive someone for malicious purposes. This means that you should not pretend to be someone else, or lie to a person online, when your intentions for doing so are not well-intended.
• Everything you write online could potentially be viewed by anyone. Some people tend to forget this and say things that they shouldn't say or that they would not want others to see.
• Just like offline, you should respect someone's right to end a conversation with you. Not respecting the other person's wishes is a type of harassment and is disrespectful.

For more information on Interacting Online, visit http://deal.org/the-knowzone/internet-safety/interacting-online/